Drug Addiction

The above video recently went viral with people expressing shock because of the girl’s eloquence.

I have followed the work of Pastor Rapu for some time now. He has for years been going to the slums of Lagos through his foundation “Freedom Foundation” gradually saving lives, bringing young men and women out of a reckless world of drug addiction, prostitution, gangs and other social degradation. There have been many, and I have been privileged to see one or two testify at his church about their transformation.

There was a case of the young boy Lekan who unfortunately was killed in gang violence https://instagram.com/p/BZPG2OdlsNe/. This was one of the popular stories from the work of the freedom foundation, but there have been so many amazing stories of lives transformed by the efforts and work of Pastor Tony and his team.

The reason Lizzy’s story went viral is because of her fluency and the schools she claimed she attended. A lot of the commenters wondered about her parents and what could have gone wrong.It shows that most things in life regarding children still comes back to parenting! The responsibility on parents is huge. Unfortunately, there is no manual for parenting, parents can only try their best by setting good examples, advising, cheering, urging and praying for their Children – if they are of faith.

Most parents dread drug addiction and a child with a drug problem is any parent’s worst nightmare. I looked into what drug addiction is, how to know if a child is into drugs and also how to prevent it from happening.

Drug Addiction.

Drugs are chemicals that change the way a person’s body works. They can be legal or illegal.

Legal Drugs are medicinal drugs prescribed by medical doctors for treatment. Cigarettes and Alcohol are other types of legal drugs. Marijuana is legal in a few Countries or States. Even though they are legal, it is advised by Doctors as well as the Government that they are used in moderation.

Illegal drugs (hard drugs) are any other kind of drugs outside of legal drugs. Examples include crystal meth, marijuana, cocaine, ecstasy, LSD, and heroin.

Abuse of legal drugs and the use of illegal drugs (hard drugs) can lead to a drug problem or an addiction.

A drug addiction is a brain disorder characterised by compulsive drug seeking and use despite adverse consequences. Addictions can be prevented and are treatable. They can, however, last a lifetime and may lead to death if left untreated.

How do kids get hooked on drugs

Every parent dreads this happening, statistics show that most kids try something before the age of 20, but not all get hooked. So how do some get hooked?

The truth is parents’ action around their children influences them a lot. Smoking or drinking should be done sensibly and in moderation especially when you’re around your children.

Nothing influences children more than peer pressure. Friends are the major reasons why kids get into drug addiction so the need to watch your child’s circle and place restrictions when necessary cannot be over-emphasized.

Reasons why children could get into drugs

  • Pressure to fit in or be accepted: The pressure to fit in and be accepted by their peers can make a child get into drugs and drinking. Drugs can provide an instant ‘in’ to the popular crowd or a desirable social group.
  • Going through emotional or psychological pain: this could range from parents divorcing to moving, changing schools or death in the family.
  • Boredom: Some kids get into drugs out of boredom or the need to socialise. Drugs becomes sonething new to do and experiment with.
  • Media and popular culture: the music that children listen to, as well as tv shows and movies, could also influence a drug habit.
  • Rebellion: Children can get hooked on drugs as an act of rebellion.

Signs of Drug Use.

  1. Loss of interest in school.
  2. Mood swings and anxiousness.
  3. Change of friends.
  4. Weight loss or gain.
  5. Puffiness or bloodshot eyes.
  6. Uncontrollable coughing and running nose.
  7. Asking to be left alone and indifference to family.
  8. Getting in fights and having problems with authority.
  9. Having trouble concentrating.
  10. Impaired speech or coordination.
  11. Unusual smells or breath.
  12. Hyperactivity or lethargy.

Popular drugs that children take.

Alcohol and tobacco are the drugs most commonly abused by adolescents, followed by marijuana. Other substances used differ between age groups.

Young adolescents tend to favour inhalant substances (such as breathing the fumes of household cleaners, glues, or pens; while older teens are more likely to use synthetic marijuana (“K2” or “Spice”) and prescription medications and stimulants.

A survey by Monitoring the Future on adolescent drug use and attitudes shows that prescription and over-the-counter medications account for a majority of the drugs most commonly abused by high-school seniors.

Here are the names of the popular dugs to look out for:


This drug is easy to order online and is very popular with teens and young adults. Its effects includes respiratory problem, depression and psychosis. It is also highly addictive.

Synthetic Drugs

Synthetic drugs are also very popular with younger people. They include synthetic cannabinoids such as Spice and K2. These drugs are manufactured chemicals that are often sprayed on dried plant material. This allows them to be smoked in a method similar to marijuana. They are also sold as liquids which can be vaporized in e-cigarettes. Common street names include Spice, K2, Genie, Red Magic and Fake Weed.

Synthetic cathinones, commonly referred to as “bath salts,” are similar in that they are manufactured substances. Often used as a substitute for cocaine or amphetamines they can be swallowed, snorted, smoked, or injected and remain popular among teens young adults. Common names include Flakka, Ivory Wave, Stardust, Cloud Nine, Meow Meow, Vanilla Sky, and White Knight or White Lightning.

Since synthetic drugs are largely unregulated and can be highly dangerous and unpredictable, it is imperative that parents familiarize themselves with these substances, which are often mistaken for benign incenses and can be purchased at many local gas stations and paraphernalia shops.


Lysergic acid diethylamide (LSD) is the most popular Hallucinogen. LSD is often taken as a tablet or “blotter.” Another type is Psilocybin, also known as “Magic Mushrooms,” a naturally-produced psychedelic compound found in species of mushrooms. Dried or fresh mushrooms are often ingested, prepared as a tea or consumed with other foods.

Other substances include marijuana cigarettes, which are dipped in solutions to enhance the hallucinogenic effects of THC, with embalming fluid is among the substances used. As one might imagine, this solution can produce disastrous effects, such as decreased lung function and an increased risk of cancer when used recreationally.


Opioids continue to be popular among all age groups, including young adults. Young adults consume more prescription medications recreationally than any other age group, sometimes in combination with alcohol, placing them at increased risk for respiratory failure.

Here are the street names and drug lingo popularly used by teens and young adults:

  1. Beezin- This involves teens rubbing Burt’s Bees lip balm onto their eyelids 😧. The balm contains peppermint oil, which creates a tingling sensation that teens claim enhances the feeling of being drunk or high, helps keep them alert after a long night and increases their attention span. However, this can irritate eyes and even cause an eye infection or swelling. Teens think it’s safe to do this because Burt’s Bees is “natural” and won’t cause any harm, but that is far from the truth.
  2. Sizzurp– This concoction is made by combining soda, candy and prescription cough medicine with codeine in it. This lethal cocktail is highly addictive because of the sweetness and is supposed to provide the user with a euphoric high. But it is extremely dangerous because it can lead to seizures and possibly cause you to stop breathing. Popular culture, including hit songs and Internet videos highlight this drug and refer to it as “purple drank,” “lean” and “syrup.”
  3. Caffeine powder: This powdered caffeine is used by teens to enhance their workouts and accelerate the process of weight loss. This substance is extremely easy to overdose on. Teens assume it’s safe to mix this powder into drinks because caffeine is in sodas, energy drinks and coffee.
  4. E-cigarettes – This electronic form of cigarettes are battery-operated devices that produce flavored nicotine that look and feel like tobacco smoke. Even though e-cigarettes do not contain tobacco, they still supply nicotine which is a highly addictive drug. But still, e-cigarettes are legal for adults. Some teenagers have used e-cigarettes to smoke marijuana and replace the nicotine with THC. Synthetic marijuana in liquid form can be ordered from the Internet and the user can get a high that is extremely potent because there is no method of dose control.
  5. Club drug: MDMA – This stimulant enchants users because of its euphoric and energetic effect. It can come in a crystallized powder form “Molly” and in pill form “ecstasy”.
  6. Club drug: Rohypnol – commonly known as the “date rape drug.” At parties, people secretly place the drug in drinks. This drug also is referred to as “roofies” and “forget-me pill”.
  7. Synthetic weed – popular because it doesn’t show up in drug tests like regular weed. But it is incredibly unsafe and toxic because as chemists synthesize the weed, it becomes stronger and up to 80 times more potent than regular weed. “Spice,” “K-2” and “Yucatan Fire” are names associated with it.
  8. Bath salts – This substance is not what we put in our bathtubs. People inject it, snort it and mix it with food or drink to receive a euphoric high. But it also can make users hallucinate, execute violent behavior and have suicidal thoughts. Watch out for these street terms: “Ivory Wave,” “Purple Wave,” Vanilla Sky” and “Bliss.”
  9. Prescription drug: Xanax – This pill is prescribed to alleviate anxiety and panic disorders. It is extremely addictive and highly abused. Teenagers mistakenly believe that because it’s a prescription drug, it’s safer than street drugs and is free from harmful side effects. The most common street names are “bars” and “Z-bar.”
  10. “Huffing” – This term refers to purposefully inhaling chemical vapors to get high. Users will inhale several household items including nail polish remover, glue, felt-tip markers, spray paint, hair-care products and deodorant.
  11. Palcohol – this new product is freeze-dried alcohol in powder form. It is packaged in small packets which makes it easy to prepare a to-go drink. But the risk of abuse and misuse is high because the accessibility of the packets could stimulate over-consumption of alcohol and lead to drunk driving. This powdered substance can be snorted as well and cause an immediate high with other harmful side effects.

What Parents Can Do

The availability and quantity of drugs has changed. It’s not nearly as hard to obtain drugs today because it’s more accepted and isn’t criticized as much by parts of society. It is therefore imperative to talk to children from a young age about the dangers of taking drugs.

Parents should make sure that their kids are aware they shouldn’t take any drug that’s not prescribed by their doctor. Prescription instructions should also be followed.

They should be made to understand that just because a friend is doing something doesn’t mean they should be doing it too. Let them know that a prescription is only for the person who has been prescribed the medication from a doctor and should be the only person taking the medication.

It is important to sit down and talk to your children about these issues. Parents can also try the following:

  • Find activities for their children to do which can help them socialise. This should be in a safe and healthy environment and parents of teens and young adults should regularly text or call to check on them.
  • Get to know your children’s friends as well as their parents. Ensure any friendships that are no good are cut off. Advise them to call you the moment they find themselves in an uncomfortable position.
  • There should be curfews, late return should not be tolerated.
  • Engage your senses fully, sniff around when they come home to make sure they don’t smell of any substance and if they do, have a talk with them immediately. (smell clothes, hair and look around their room regularly).
  • Give them chores to do, make them responsible for things around the house.
  • Be involved in their life, ensure they do their homework, have family dinners as often as possible, talk to them about your day and some of your challenges. Ask for their opinion on appropriate matters etc. This promotes trust and encourages them to open up about their own challenges.

The Role of the Internet in Drug Use

Today, the internet continues to be a primary source of information about drugs for many young people. There are sites devoted to explaining drug use.

Additionally, young people often report obtaining drugs from site on the “Dark Web,” a part of the internet that requires special software or authorization to access and is not found on regular search engines, making them largely untraceable.

These drugs are sent via mail, sometimes to an address where they can be received without a parent’s knowledge. Cryptocurrencies like Bitcoin may also be a source of payment, creating a largely anonymous purchase experience.


A home with a caring parent(s) fosters confident children. A confident child is harder to influence and is more likely to discuss matters with their parents.

Please Show interest in your child’s life – be present. Monitor internet activities. There are different spy wares in the market now that can be used. This does not mean you should invade their privacy, just monitor the sites being visited and make sure they stay safe.

Aunty Lulu.











Was He Right Not to Pay?

Was He Right Not to Pay?

A step-dad refused to pay for his daughter’s wedding at the last minute because she allowed her biological father back into her life.

I came across this interesting story on Facebook. I did a little research on it and even though the story – posted on Reddit in 2003- has not been verified, it is nonetheless still intriguing.

Have a read and please let me know your thoughts 😊.

My step-daughter will be getting married on August 3rd. The wedding planning has consumed most of her and her mother’s life (I say her mother because we aren’t married, though we’ve lived together for 10 years) for the past six months.

My step-daughter graduated last December from University. I paid for her to go to college, though it was a state school, it still ran $40K. She does not have a job and has been living with us for the duration of her college career and since her graduation. I also bought her a car to get back and forth from school when she finished high school.

From time to time her deadbeat father would pop into her life and she would fawn all over him. Although he has not contributed a cent to her education or paid any child support, though that is my girlfriend’s fault as c.s. was not part of the settlement, she still loves him and wants him in her life. He stays long enough to break her heart by skipping town and breaking some promise that he made her.

The wedding venue holds 250 people max. I gave them a list of 20 people that I wanted invited, you know, since I was paying for everything. They told me that was no problem and they’d take care of it. So I let these people know they’d be getting an invite and they should save the date. Saturday, I saw one of my friends on this list at the golf course and asked if he was coming. He told me that he wasn’t invited. He told me that he got an announcement, but not an invitation. He had it in his back seat (along with probably six months of mail) and showed it to me. Sure enough, it was just an announcement, and my name was nowhere on it. It had her dad’s name and her mom’s name and not mine.

This led to a pretty big fight with my GF, as I found out that NONE of my list of twenty “made the cut” for the final guest list because “250 people is very tight.” I was pissed, but not a hell of a lot I could do because the important people in my life had already been offended. My GF said “if some people didn’t rsvp yes, I might be able to get a couple people in.” But that is an ultimate slap in the face in my opinion. So, I was boiling on Saturday.

Yesterday, we had a Sunday dinner with the future in-law’s family and us and a surprise guest, the “Real Dad.” At this little dinner my step-daughter announced that her “Real Dad” was going to be able to make it to her wedding and that now he’d be able to give her away. This was greeted with a chorus of “Oh how great” and “How wonderful”s.

I don’t think I have ever felt so angry and so disrespected. I was shaking. I took a few seconds to gather my composure, because I honestly wasn’t sure if I would cry or start throwing punches or both. Once I was sure I’d be able to speak I got up from my chair and said I’d like to make a toast. I can’t remember exactly what I said but the gist of it was this:

“I’d like to make a toast.” The sound of spoons against glasses ring in my years. “It has been my great pleasure to be a part of this family for the past ten years.” Awe, how sweet. “At this point in my life I feel I owe a debt of gratitude to bride and groom, because they have opened my eyes to something very important.” Confident smiles exchanged. “They have showed me that my position in this family is not what I once thought it was.” And now a glimmer of confusion and shock begins to spread on the faces in the room. “Though I once thought of myself as the patriarch or godfather of the family, commanding great respect and sought out for help in times of need, it seems instead that I hold the position of an ATM, good for a stream of money, but not much else. As I have been replaced as host, both on the invitations and in the ceremony, I am resigning my financial duties as host to my successor, Real Dad. So cheers to the happy couple and the path they have chosen.” I finished my drink. “You all can let yourselves out.”

Is this selfish? I’m supposed to shell out 40 – 50 grand for a wedding that I can’t invite anyone to? That I am not a part of? I’m so done with this crap. I’m done with my step-daughter, I’m done with my GF. I transferred the money out of our joint account last night. (she has not had a job since she moved in with me) This morning I called all the vendors I had written checks to for deposits to refund my money. At present it looks like I’ll lose around 1500, for the venue, but the other vendors have been great about refunding.

Would you have done the same or do you think he overreacted?




Fashion – Nigerian brands I love.

Fashion – Nigerian brands I love.

I am a big supporter of Nigerian and generally African indigenous Fashion brands. As a lover of fashion, I have been blown away by the talent that has been coming out of our continent, most especially, Nigeria.

It is my belief that the fashion industry has a huge potential to diversify the Nigerian economy. Achieving this means not only embracing our designers but also showcasing their work to the world as much as possible.

There are a few pioneers of-course like the renowned Deola Sagoe, Otumemine and a few others who are the doyens of the industry. They paved the way for the younger brands I’ll be profiling – with their impressive haute couture.

I have chosen to focus on the younger brands because they brought the wear Nigerian appeal to the younger Nigerian consumers with their Pret a porter (ready to wear) and streetwear.

Have a look at the work of my favourite Nigerian designers – charity they say begins at home 😊, so I will be starting with Ilàré and Lanre Dasilva Ajayi (LDA).

Please enjoy and leave your comments as usual 😘.


This is very close to home and dear to my heart as the brand is owned by 3 beautiful sisters and one of them is married to my brother.The brand made my list simply because of talent, trust me😊.

Aptly described as a brand for “Girls By Girls, the Ilàré brand is young, fun and contemporary.

Ope, Ebun and Tosin the beautiful sisters behind Ilare

Ilàré is a high-end ready-to-wear womenswear brand that focuses on the African woman’s body and creates pieces that are both flattering and celebratory of her frame. The brand has a creative approach of integrating bold designs with solid colours.




This eponymous fashion brand is clearly one of my favourite Nigerian brands. It certainly is a no-brainer that she designed my bridesmaids dresses at my wedding 10 years ago. Yes, she’s being in the game for that long.

LDA was launched in 2005 and the label includes couture and ready-to-wear. She is one of the pioneers of Nigerian ready to wear fashion as a lot of people started taking Nigerian fashion seriously after she and a few others entered the market with their professionally made ready to wear outfits.

Before then, most Nigerians only wore Nigerian made clothes for weddings and other traditional festivities, but their entry into the fashion scene changed the game in Nigerian fashion.

Lanre Dasilva Ajayi – Creative Director LDA

Her collections often incorporate metallic fabrics, lace, and African patterns. She draws a lot of inspiration from 1940s and 1800s fashion.

LDA is one of the most successful Nigerian designers. Her brand has earned international acclaim for re-interpreting and modernising traditional motifs in her designs.

She has presented a collection at the New York Fashion Week, had her clothing line sold at Dolce &Gabbana’s “Concept Spiga 2” store in Milan and has been featured in Italian Vogue and other magazines.

The affable designer’s brand is sought after by the Nigerian celebrities and upper class.

The queen of the runway – NAOMI CAMPBELL modeling a LDA piece
OLUCHI ORLANDI on the runway for LDA
Mayowa Nichols rocks the Victorian Tier Dress
Nollywood actress Rita Dominic in a LDA Couture dress
Zainab Balogun in LDA
Toni Tones in LDA Suit
Tiwa Savage in LDA
My lovely bridal party in LDA

I am bursting with pride and all giddy at the moment. This is because of the amazing fashion from the Nigerian brands I’m going to be profiling on the blog.

I hope you enjoy the ride with me.







Let’s Talk Bullying – The Dreaded Monster.

Keven Reese Jr hanged himself in January after being bullied at school. His mum says she had no idea how distraught he was in the days leading to his death.
Keven Reese Jr hanged himself in January after being bullied at school. His mum says she had no idea how distraught he was in the days leading to his death.

I read a heart-breaking report of a 10-year-old’s suicide as a result of bullying. The news, like every other bullying news, sent shivers down my spine as my heart ached for the bereaved family – how did it get so bad? How did he know what to do? How could this have been prevented? Those were some of the questions running through my mind as I pondered on the story.

The world is very different from when we were growing up. A lot of things that we were shielded from, have to be discussed with our children early. There’s a need to stay on top of happenings in their life, ask questions – don’t stop asking questions.

Some parents are lucky as their children quickly tell them everything going on, but some children are more reserved and keep to themselves. It is the responsibility of the parent to look for ways of getting information out of them so as to be sure that all is well with them.

What if your child is a bully?

Bullying according to the Anti-Bullying Alliance is a repetitive behaviour that involves an imbalance of power.

Most parents don’t like to think their child is a bully, but the truth is most children at some point or other have bullied another child but some just make a habit of it.

Parents have a huge responsibility to watch their children for bullying traits, it’s not just the parents of the victims that should be cautious.

Interestingly, it’s quite easy to spot bullying traits in children as it mostly starts with teasing. A child that teases their siblings or friends or even parents relentlessly should be cautioned and steps should be taken to ensure they stop it. Teasing in itself is not bullying, but when it becomes hurtful, unkind and constant then it crosses the line into bullying and needs to stop.

Look out for aggressive or negative response to or about other children, having money or belongings that are not theirs, report from other parents or teachers about aggressive behaviour, etc. These points don’t necessarily mean a child is a bully, but they should just be checked to prevent or stop irrational behaviour.

Here are a few reasons why children might be unkind to other kids:

  • The need to fit in with a group of friends who are picking on another child.
  • Attention seeking from parents, teachers or classmates.
  • A child could be more assertive and impulsive than their peers.
  • A tendency to perceive the behaviour of others as hostile even if it is not.
  • A child is getting bullied at home or at school and is trying to regain a sense of power.
  • An inability to fully grasp how their behaviour is making the victim feel.

If you notice your child bullies their sibling or even a parent and it’s getting out of hand, you should seek help for them because chances are that they are doing worse to another child at school.


Types of bullying

Bullying can come in different forms, just as bullies also come in different forms. A bully can operate alone or as part of a group. None is more dangerous than the other as both forms can have devastating outcomes if not dealt with on time.

Bullying can be any of the following:

  • Indirect or Verbal Bullying (Teasing, name-calling, rumour spreading, etc.).
  • Direct or Physical bullying (Hitting, kicking – causing bodily harm)
  • Virtual or Cyber Bullying (threats or name-calling via social media, sharing private photos or videos etc.)

Bullying can be a combination of all the 3 forms mentioned above. None of these is better than the other as they can all result in horrible outcomes.


Effects of bullying

The results of bullying are always negative, particularly on the victim. Bullies pick on the sensitive points of their target to oppress them leaving them feeling threatened and powerless. Interestingly, it does have negative effects on the bully as well.

The target of a bully could experience any of the following:

Poor academic performance.

Feeling upset and inferior.

Self Harming.

Feeling Shut out.

Feeling Suicidal.

Parents should talk to their children about bullying from an early age. Always let your children/ward understand that NO ONE has the right to bully them. No one means exactly what it is, not a sibling, friend, school mate (junior or senior) or teacher has the right to bully them.

In as much as most schools have anti-bullying policies and try to sensitize the children about bullying and its effects, the bulk of the responsibility lies on the parents. It is the parents’ duty to ensure their child is not being bullied nor are they bullies.

If your child is being bullied, it is natural for you to want the child to fight back. Please refrain from doing so as it can escalate into violence with someone else getting injured. Instead, you can advise them to try the following:

  1. Ignore the bully as much as possible, if this does not work stand up for yourself and tell the bully off.
  2. If the above does not work, the child should report to a teacher that can be trusted. This teacher can alert other teachers to keep an eye on the situation.
  3. Tell a friend they can trust, It’s always good to have a witness if possible. Moreover, a friend can offer good moral support or together you can stand up against the bully, especially if it’s group bullying.
  4. Keep records of dates, times and instances the bullying occurred.
  5. Speak to the school counsellor about the bullying.
  6. Most importantly, children should be advised to speak to their parents first about any case of bullying.


Bullies are not monsters from outer space or red horned demons, they are normal human beings like you and me – sometimes harmless-looking children and sometimes adults. The government tries its best to make sure schools have an anti-bullying policy but as stated earlier, parents have a huge role to play in putting an end to bullying.

Parents should do all they can to raise confident children. This will make it difficult for anyone to bully them, and if it happens they’re confident enough to ask for help if they can’t cope.

Tips for raising confident children include:

  • Love your child/ren.
  • Always give praise where it is due.
  • Model self-love and positive self-talk.
  • Teach resilience.
  • Encourage sports and other physical activities.
  • Do not draw comparisons between children.
  • Don’t offer insincere praise.
  • Let them help, give them chores to do.
  • Encourage curiosity, let them figure things out themselves.
  • Don’t make exceptions for them.
  • Be a good role model.

The truth is for parents of bullies, it is never pleasant to realise your child is bullying someone else’s child but it is essential you act fast. Rather than being in denial take actions to curb it. Make your child understand their actions are hurtful and harmful and they need to apologise and stop it.

Parents should also watch themselves and the way they respond to situations as most children behave like their parents. If you’re a bully, your child will very likely be a bully too.

Whatever the cause of bullying, a parent should talk to their child about it so as to understand their point of view. Communication is key in curbing bullying. A parent also has to monitor the situation, check your child’s online activity and watch how they talk to people.

Bullying is not easy both for the parent of the target as well as the bully. It is imperative that we stay connected to our children, listen to them, get involved with their life as much as possible and most importantly show kindness and respect to people. They are likely to pick those traits.

You should be more watchful if your child has a weight problem (over-weight or skinny) or is very shy as bullies pick on weight, religion, race or even social standing. 

Unfortunately, health conditions are not left out as was the case with 10-year-old Seven bridges who took his own life after being repeatedly bullied at school for wearing a colostomy bag because of a bowel condition. There was another case of 9-year-old Maddison Whittsett who hanged herself because she was being bullied. She had attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) and was occasionally bullied at school, with friends calling her”stupid” and “dumb”.

It’s alarming the number of child suicide – due to bullying – I read about while writing this post. I’m sure most of the families involved would never have thought it could happen to them. That is why it is important to monitor your child’s well-being. Even if you have to change classes or even schools – please do not delay.

Please don’t shy away from seeking help for your child if it’s getting out of hand.

Aunty Lulu.







Health Talk With Adeola

health talk with Adeola



Erectile dysfunction (ED), also known as impotence, is the inability to get and maintain an erection. In some cases the penis becomes partly erect but not hard enough to have sex properly.

Most men have occasional times when they cannot get an erection. For example, you may not get an erection so easily if you are tired, stressed, distracted, or have drunk too much alcohol. For most men, it is only temporary and an erection occurs most times when they are sexually aroused.

ED is a very common condition, particularly in older men but it can occur at any age. It is estimated that half of all men between the ages of 40 and 70 will have it to some degree.
ED is usually treatable, most commonly by a tablet taken before sex. You may also receive lifestyle advice and treatments to minimise the risk of heart disease.


Physical causes:

  1. Reduced blood flow to the penis(a rush of blood to the penis is needed for erection): this is the commonest cause of ED in men aged over 40. Smoking, high blood pressure, high cholesterol, obesity and growing older can increase the risk of reduction of blood flow to all parts of the body.
  2. Diseases that affect the nerves going to the penis e,g stroke.
  3. Diabetes: one of the most common causes of ED. Diabetes can affect blood vessels and nerves.
  4. Hormonal causes: a lack of a hormone called testosterone which is made in the testicles (testes).Other symptoms of a low testosterone level include a reduced sex drive (libido) and changes in mood.
  5. Injury to the nerves going to the penis: eg spinal injury.
  6. Medication side effects: most common are some antidepressants; beta-propranolol, atenolol, etc; some ‘water tablets’ (diuretics); cimetidine. Many other less commonly used tablets sometimes cause ED.
  7. Alcohol and drug abuse.
  8. Cycling: ED after long-distance cycling is thought to be common. It is probably due to pressure on the nerves going to the penis, from sitting on the saddle for long periods. This may affect the function of the nerve after the ride.

Psychological causes:

  1. Stress: this can occur due to a difficult work or home situation
  2. Anxiety.
  3. Relationship difficulties.
  4. Depression.

As a rule, if there are times when you can get a good erection ( eg by masturbating or if your early morning erection is intact ) but at other times you can’t get an erection then a psychological cause for the ED is more likely than a physical cause.

ED causes poor self-esteem, anxiety and even depression. These reactions to ED can make the ED worse and lead to a vicious circle of worsening anxiety, depression and persisting ED.

The good news however is that ED is usually treatable, most commonly by a tablet taken before sex. You may also receive lifestyle advice and treatments to minimise your risk of cardiovascular disease therefore it is imperative you see your doctor who can review your current medication, run some tests to find any underlying cause , suggest lifestyle advice & changes and decide with you the necessary intervention . 

These interventions can be creams, medications, devices , urethral prosthesis and injections, counseling and psychosexual therapies and/or refer you on for more specialist support intervention depending on the cause found.

Note that tablets to treat ED will cause an erection only when you are sexually aroused.

The take-home message is to encourage men to overcome barriers and to seek medical advice when affected by Erectile dysfunction.

Always seek professional help. Consult your doctor.
Best wishes.

References: Patient.co.uk, NICE CKS, GP notebook .